Who is Alex Watt?

Javier Vazquez?

Tue, 22 Dec 2009 10:24:54 -0500

Please, tell me this is a joke.

While they’re at it, why don’t they bring back Jon Lieber, Esteban Loaiza, Jose Contreras, and anyone else who contributed to the worst collapse in Yankee history.

…just when I thought I finally repressed my memories of the 2004 ALCS, Cashman goes and brings back the man who served up Johnny Damon’s Grand Slam.

Possible Intramural Basketball Team Name

Mon, 21 Dec 2009 16:19:14 -0500

Hooped My Pants

For the first time in anyone’s memory, Yale offered admission to quadruplets

Sat, 19 Dec 2009 00:14:00 -0500

For the first time in anyone’s memory, Yale offered admission to quadruplets:

If they are really that smart, only one of them will accept admittance to Yale while the rest come together and adopt one single identity, assign one year of college to each quadruplet, and graduate from an Ivy League school four years later having done the work of a community college dropout.

Worst case scenario someone catches on to your scheme, setting forth a zany chain of events. In that case, you have an awesome sitcom to pitch to FOX.

Thoughts During Finals Week

Fri, 18 Dec 2009 23:43:41 -0500

Is not showering during finals week superstition, a study technique, or a blatant abuse of the freedom gained from not having to go to class?

Because it seems to be common practice around these parts.

Getting "defriended" on Facebook

Tue, 15 Dec 2009 20:24:00 -0500

If I would have known how bad it hurts to get “defriended” I would never have done it to the kid who dominated my News Feed by becoming a fan of everyday things (I was unaware that someone could be a fan of “Pushing those little buttons on the lids of fast food soft drinks”). What really gets me is if I didn’t happen to be looking at old pictures that we were both tagged in I would have never known I was “defriended.” It really makes me wonder how many times I’ve been “defriended” and its gone unnoticed.

I know I shouldn’t be taking life lessons from George Costanza, but this recent “defriending” has rendered me virtually handless. And as everyone knows, “A man without hand is not a man.”

Filling out forms

Tue, 15 Dec 2009 11:32:40 -0500

At what age is it no longer acceptable to not know your Social Security Number by heart?

Rolling Stone's 100 Best Songs of the Decade

Fri, 11 Dec 2009 22:13:00 -0500

Rolling Stone's 100 Best Songs of the Decade:

kevinslane:

january20:

This is a very solid list. A lot better than that one that was floating around a few months back and now I can’t find a link to reference it properly.

Hahaha, that was Pitchfork’s. They’re the hipsters of music publications, don’t worry about it. That being said, listen to more LCD Soundsystem, they’re really good.

EDIT: This list is ok, but I question their panel of experts. And also, you made it sound like there wasn’t going to be any LCD Soundsystem, but they still charted 3 songs on that list.

Judging by their absence from this list, I’ll have to assume that Rolling Stone is coming out with a separate list counting down the 100 Best Songs (Chipmunk Version) of the decade.

WARNING: Do not try and “punch-open” the packaging...

Fri, 11 Dec 2009 17:51:44 -0500

WARNING: Do not try and “punch-open” the packaging to Sour Patch Candy Canes, because you will ruin your roommate’s Christmas.

In light of the Tiger Woods scandal, I would advise Nike to change their slogan from “Just Do...

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 13:36:06 -0500

In light of the Tiger Woods scandal, I would advise Nike to change their slogan from “Just Do It” to the more specific “Just Do It With Your Wife.”

For the majority of my life I have used a unisex, although slightly feminite, gel deodorant. I...

Thu, 03 Dec 2009 00:35:59 -0500

For the majority of my life I have used a unisex, although slightly feminite, gel deodorant. I recently made the switch to a more masculine, heavily scented brand and my armpits now feel like they are on fire. Every time I put it on I am compelled to cover the burning sensation with my hands and scream into the mirror, a la Kevin McCallister in “Home Alone”, but armpits are too awkwardly positioned on the human body to do it any justice, and I am no Mac Culkin.

I really hope my fresh, manly scent is worth putting up with the torid firestorm blazing in my ‘pits

robotindisguise: waxandmilk: More Bill Murray and...

Tue, 01 Dec 2009 10:57:40 -0500

robotindisguise:

waxandmilk:

More Bill Murray and basketball.

via rapvsweden / nbaoffseason

This is actually how Billy Murray prepared for his role in Space Jam.

15 Ways to Get Your Friends From Home to Hate You By...

Tue, 24 Nov 2009 21:21:34 -0500

15 Ways to Get Your Friends From Home to Hate You By Thanksgiving

A guy can really learn a lot about birth control from those commercials written to sound like casual...

Sun, 22 Nov 2009 18:42:06 -0500

A guy can really learn a lot about birth control from those commercials written to sound like casual conversations.

For the past couple of days I have been using my roommate’s toothpaste. Apparently, his...

Sun, 22 Nov 2009 18:37:30 -0500

For the past couple of days I have been using my roommate’s toothpaste. Apparently, his toothpaste is meant to be used by people with sensitive teeth only. My teeth have been killing me ever since I found this out, is it guilt that I am feeling or is the toothpaste having an adverse effect?

Oh, Nate, when will you ever learn?

Sat, 21 Nov 2009 21:55:18 -0500

Oh, Nate, when will you ever learn?

Somehow “Slow Jamz” by Twista ft. Kanye West and Jamie Foxx found its way onto the play...

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 00:32:00 -0500

Somehow “Slow Jamz” by Twista ft. Kanye West and Jamie Foxx found its way onto the play list at the gym. I think I was the only person in the entire gym who didn’t put on a face to pretend like I was disgusted with the song selection. I think that everyone must have secretly wanted it on because not one person even attempted to change song (which really means something because just last week three gentlemen got into an argument about whether we should be listening to “Encore” by Jay-Z/Linkin Park or “Lose Yourself” by Eminem Sometimes I hate the gym.

erockappel: Wow, “Late Night” knocked it out of the fucking...

Wed, 18 Nov 2009 23:26:59 -0500

erockappel:

Wow, “Late Night” knocked it out of the fucking park with this one! Well done!

A.D. Miles is the best.

“A lot of faces out here tonight. It looks like one of those sting operations where they...

Mon, 16 Nov 2009 23:15:00 -0500

“A lot of faces out here tonight. It looks like one of those sting operations where they promise to trade you Laker tickets for guns and then next thing you know child services has you in handcuffs.”

—George Lopez on “Lopez Tonight”

I may be a white kid from Long Island, but I highly doubt that there are many, if any, people that can relate to this.

Photo

Mon, 16 Nov 2009 20:18:17 -0500

Photo

Mon, 16 Nov 2009 12:58:01 -0500